You totally had one of these in your school

I just caught him in line, giving himself a wedgie and then showing it to other kids. I mean, really?

Sword of Damocles

My school hearts art all over the place. There's always stuff on the walls, on stands in the middle of the hallway, and hanging down from the ceiling. Right now, here's a peek into what we have:

• chrysalises hanging from the ceiling
• a giant spider attached to the rafters
• nationalistic umbrellas hanging from the ceiling
• large-scale puppets attached to the wall (permanent installation)

and, duh duh duhn...

• a huge, frighteningly sharp, sheet-metal sculpture 

This huge, frighteningly sharp sheet-metal sculpture is hanging above the staircase, where a friendly box with twine around it used to be. It looks like a deli slicer and probably will slice someone any day now.

Dung Beetle

Bits:

• Studying the eating habits of dung beetles (i.e., they eat poop) prompted one kid to exclaim again and again, "I'm hungry!"
• Another bathroom accident.
• Another bloody nose.
• Glue on face.
• Swine flu symptoms.

Research Trip

We might want to campaign for new trash cans. So we investigated how they got this awesome community center built.

We listened and learned and inquired. And we took notes.

Best of Writing

"Me and my mom was home. We were woching the golden girls. It was very, very funny!"

"My dad was sad because my dog was bleeting in the tail."

"On that sunny Sunday, me and my mom were going to Manhattan. There was 2 clouds, 1 sun, and 1 house."

"I had a good sleep last night. Ontil a man screemed like this 'aaaawh aaaaawh.' I said in my mind, 'be quiet man. Some people are trying to sleep here.'"

Happy Memorial Day

vacation!

Smallness

I usually forget how small my students are. But then I'll have to help with a broken belt buckle or help button up pants. They are so small. They weigh like 50 pounds.

Fingers and Toes

It's not always easy to tell why you would count by 10, or 5, or 2. So we started at almost square one: fingers and toes.

This involved me standing barefoot during math. One kid counted my toes while another kid counted my feet. Eew.

And I had a moment thinking, "wtf do I do all day..."

That didn't last long because we had to hold hands and count.

"Ants Are Cannibals"

Insect update:

The butterflies have all emerged from their chrysalises. Two already died. Two from the other class already mated. Oo la la!

The mealworms and beetles are all over the place. Some are still mealworms; some are in the pupa stage; some are beetles. The beetles are starting to eat the mealworms. Something--maybe swine flu?--hit the pupa, which are dropping off like flies. One even had a hold in its head.

Smells Fishy

Two related bits:

1. The kid who wanted to sleep in the Mouse House exclaimed today, regarding the classroom, "I want to sleep in here!" Is that his way of expressing enjoyment? 

2. The classroom stinks to high heaven on warm days. You walk in and get a blast of what I can only assume is dead animal.

Puts these two together and I just don't know.

P.S. I'm starting a campaign for saying, "I want to sleep in here!" whenever I like a place. The movies, art exhibits, the kitchen. Who's on board?

One-eyed Stick Figures

One student consistently draws people as stick figures with one eye and a smile. The eye is on the left side of the face. Every time.

First Grade Besties

Most first graders have assorted friends. But not everyone has a best friend.

Best friends are special. They are each other's number 1, all the time, even when they get in fights. I had one (what's up, MCB!) and it made first grade a blast. But now I know why we were split up for second grade. 

Bestfriendships are oddly unhealthy.

Usually, best friends are eerily similar. I have had 3 bestfriendships in my classes over the past few years: two boys O and N, two girls J and T, and boy and girl M and N. At first glance, the friends seem different--loud vs. shy, friendly vs. awkward, boy vs. girl. But after a few weeks in one classroom, the similarities come out, loud and clear.

O and N, from last year's class, were bizarre, creative thinkers. They were bright and independent. No doubt, they both had fascinating interior monologues continuously running. And they loved each other. They needed each other. I remember a trip to the park last year, when N was building an anthill and O was in the grass a few feet over. N just yelled and yelled, "I need you! I need you!" O didn't want to help. It went on for a bit.

J and T, also from last year, were tomboys who were a little behind academically. They cared for each other, helping with scraped knees and tying shoes. They were also mischievous. When studying insects last year, one stole a chrysalis as a butterfly was emerging. We never got the story straight because they wouldn't break from backing each other up. They both took the rap for killing a crumpled-up butterfly as it was metamorphing. That's love.

And this year, M and N are the power duo. They both have neat handwriting, great math skills, and silly attitudes. They sit next to each other almost all day, and whenever we make partnerships, we have to keep them together. They're just too sweet. But then the other day, M showed N his underwear. So, sigh...it had to happen some time.

What's so striking to me is that these best friends pick don't pick each other because they share mutual interests ("hey, I like robots too!") but because of the types of people they are. 

Tidbits from Zoo Day

I can't believe it's only 3:30. Tidbits:

• In a visit to the dark, stinky Mouse House, one student loudly proclaimed, "I want to sleep here."
• We saw a python eating a rat.
• It rained nearly the whole time. Which prompted nearly synchronized outbursts of "umbrella, ella, ella, etc." on a few occasions.
• One kid was sort of the grandpa from Forget Paris on the bus, and he kept reading signs and commenting. Endearing.

Threat of Pinkeye

Kids have two trump cards:

1. bathroom emergencies
2. pinkeye

And they know it.

States of Confusion

There's a lot to be confused about in first grade--when is recess? how do caterpillars turn into butterflies? what makes up a family?--and sometimes teachers make it worse.

In math right now, the kids are taking an inventory of classroom materials. They need to figure out how many pencils, colored bears, geometrical shape blocks, etc., we have. This calls for organization at the very least, and an understanding of a number system based on 10 at the most. Fingers crossed, in a couple days we're going to discover place value. Mystery revealed!

In the meantime, there is hilarious and purposeful confusion all around. One group is organizing some books, and they can't decide if there are 34, 35, or 36 of them. Maybe because their tactic is to spread them around and hop from one to the other counting out loud....

Another group is counting shells, and they organized by making a triangle with 1 at the bottom, then 2, then 3, upward to 12. Maybe they're better at math than I am, but that took some thinking on my end. 

Two groups are definitely on the right track. One was working with popsicle sticks and made tally marks out of them. Four sticks squished together parallel with one stick intersecting. 

The other group had pencils, and they put them in 5s. But they really wanted to do tens but didn't have a way to put them together. They demanded rubber bands. Which we didn't have. So they ran around and got some tape and made do.

Sick Day

Everyone said that I would build up my immune system so much in the first year of teaching that I'd never get sick again.

Not true.

I need to learn my lesson and just refuse to touch hands or pencils that have been in mouths. End of story.

Fingers crossed it's not the bird flu. Last week, one of my students told me to watch out. He suggested getting a face mask. Maybe he was right.

Teacher Appreciation Week

In an effort to boost teacher morale, my school opted to celebrate Teacher Appreciation Day for the first time ever.

It was thoughtful. We got a 15-minute break to eat snacks while the Literacy Coach read a book to the kids. When we came back, they had not only read a book but had written us a letter. Apparently the kids appreciate all that we do for them. New vocab (appreciate) usage! wooo!

The outcome of this as been more hugs than usual in first grade. Random hugs are undoubtedly cute, but I am pretty immune to them at this point and would usually rather the kid get in line or get back to reading. 

But I even got a scented candle from a student today, and I really do appreciate it! It will go next to my teacher collection of snow globes.

Unfortunately, I've let this go to my head. All week, I got so used to being given hugs and drawings and stuff that I almost stole someone's picture today. I assumed she gave it to me. She was confused when I took it. We both felt sheepish. 

Things That Make Us Sad

We went on a community walk yesterday to learn what is in the community (ooh firehouse, ooh post office, ooh barber shop). 

Little do the kids know, this is going to morph into a unit about social change, bureaucracy, and democracy. Hopefully we will write letters and advocate for ourselves.

But in the meantime, the kids had to take notes about what they saw in the neighborhood. Armed with clipboards, they walked along and jotted down things like, "dog poop" and "tree" and "bodega" and "my cousin." 

Today we organized our notes into categories. To be expected, categories included "places to get food" and "places people work at." But then one of the smallest students, the one who hops and giggles, said in her small voice that we needed a category of "things that make us sad." 

Everyone agreed. So far, the list includes garbage and broken glass. I'm glad it doesn't have other things on it yet.

Sigh.

But who knows? Maybe we'll get more trash cans and convince the city to collect the garbage regularly. Letters from six year olds can be very persuasive.

Something Afoot

Today was a red-letter day for the footbridge. An incomplete inventory:

1 poops

1 sock (15-20 feet away)

1 hypodermic needle

Something, or someone, is clearly afoot on the bridge.

Everyone loves a birthday crown

In movies and in my memory, elementary school was a goofy place to be. Now I know that all the songs were to teach us things we didn't want to learn, and the dress-up days were to keep us interested enough to keep coming back.

But sometimes it's undeniably just for fun.

Like birthdays. Understandably enough, we celebrate the kids' birthdays. They get sparkly birthday crowns, but usually we regulate any sort of celebrate to lunch and recess and no other time. If we don't forget, we'll sing the birthday song. We sternly cut back on the extra verses.

By natural extension to the celebration, we get to celebrate adult birthdays just as--if not more--enthusiastically. And who wouldn't love it? My last birthday crown, from over 7 months ago, is still in my bedroom.

Today was maybe the teacher birthday of all birthdays though. It was the art teacher's, and she went all out. She had a gold personally-crafted crown, arm bands, and an armor-like breast plate. Happy Birthday indeed!

Non Sequitur

I hate wasting time. In meetings, I hate getting off track. At the grocery, I hate waiting at the deli counter. 

Sometimes that means I'm heartless.

One of my students loves to let his mind wander. He is hilarious and creative, but--wow--he is unproductive. Today, he had to think of  a new story to write. 

Due to complications with allergies and pinkeye, he was seated in the front office near the receptionist, trying to get his work done. I popped by every once in a while to see how it was going.

It wasn't going well. I knelt down by him, for my 60-second teaching moment before I had to head back to class. Here's what went down:

Me: What are you writing about today?

Student: I'm not. I can't think.

Me: Well, did anything interesting happen over the weekend?

Student: Not really. I'm gonna die.

Me: Hmm, let's think of a story topic.

Student: It's true though. I'm gonna die.

Me: Mm-hmm.

Student: Aren't you sad?

Me: No, that's just what happens. Let's get back to work.

Dance Party Fridays

I got elbowed in the face during Dance Party Friday, morning edition. 

It's gotten out of hand. We started pretty calm at the beginning of the year, with your disco points and everything, but now we've got attempts at break dancing and overtly sexual awkwardnesses. One of my favorite dancers--the one who hops and giggles--didn't even know what to do when it was her turn. She tried something semi-breakdance, semi-shimmy until she gave up and bunny hopped around the circle.

Things just aren't what they used to be.